• Skip to primary navigation
  • Skip to main content
  • Skip to primary sidebar
  • Skip to footer
  • The Magazine
    • The Peachy Team
    • 2025
      • Spring 2025 (Båstad, Sweden)
      • Summer 2025 (North Carolina)
    • 2024
      • Spring 2024 (Jacksonville)
      • Summer 2024 (Boston)
      • Fall 2024 (Aspen)
      • Holiday 2024
    • 2023
      • Spring 2023 (Anniversary Issue)
      • Summer 2023 (Turks & Caicos)
      • Fall 2023 (Charlotte)
      • Holiday 2023
    • 2022
      • Spring 2022 (Nantucket)
      • Summer 2022 (Austin)
      • Fall 2022 (Asheville)
      • Holiday 2022
    • 2021
      • Spring 2021 (Charlotte interiors)
      • Summer 2021 (St. Louis)
      • Fall 2021 (Palm Beach)
      • Holiday 2021
    • 2020
      • Spring 2020 (Richmond)
      • Summer 2020 (Greenville, SC)
      • Fall 2020 (The Hamptons)
      • Holiday 2020
    • 2019
      • Spring 2019 (Santa Fe)
      • Summer 2019 (Charlotte Garden Issue)
      • Fall 2019 (Cape Cod)
      • Holiday 2019
    • 2018
      • Spring 2018 (Boston)
      • Summer 2018 (Ponte Vedra)
      • Fall 2018 (Anniversary Issue)
      • Holiday 2018
    • 2017
      • Spring 2017 (Birmingham)
      • Summer 2017 (San Francisco)
      • Fall 2017 (Jackson Hole)
      • Holiday 2017
    • 2016
      • Spring 2016 (Savannah)
      • Summer 2016 (Los Angeles)
      • Fall 2016 (NC Mountains)
      • Holiday 2016
    • 2015
      • February March 2015 (Nashville)
      • May June 2015 (Washington, D.C.)
      • July August 2015 (New Orleans)
      • September October 2015 (Austin)
      • Holiday 2015
    • 2014
      • January February 2014 (Park City)
      • March 2014 (Chicago)
      • April May 2014 (Charlotte)
      • June July 2014 (Charleston)
      • August September 2014 (Santa Barbara)
      • October November 2014 (Atlanta)
      • Holiday 2014
    • 2013
      • September 2013 (Charlotte)
      • October November 2013 (Dallas)
      • Holiday 2013 (New York)
  • Style
  • Beauty
  • Entertaining
  • Interiors
  • Gardens
  • Wellness
  • Insiders’ Guides

Peachy the Magazine

You are here: Home / Wellness Matters / How to Communicate When Co-Parents Have Divergent Planning Styles

August 17, 2023

How to Communicate When Co-Parents Have Divergent Planning Styles

For co-parenting families, there is an extra layer of complexity for all things involved with back-to-school. As a co-parenting coach and Collaborative Family Law attorney who is also a mom and stepmom to five children in their late teens and 20s, Robin offers real-world tips to help guide parents who have divergent planning styles.


By Robin M. Mermans, Esq. of ROAD to RESOLUTION

It’s that time of year again and for co-parenting families, there is an extra layer of complexity for all things involved with the back-to-school season. From shopping for school supplies and preparing for the new year to meeting new teachers and coordinating your child’s schedule, it takes a lot of patience, communication, and compromise – especially when parents have different planning styles or opposite personalities when it comes to urgency.

As a co-parenting coach and Collaborative Family Law attorney who is also a mom and stepmom to five children in their late teens and 20s, I can personally and professionally relate with parents who have divergent planning styles. I’ve worked with many co-parenting partners where one parent is an expert planner and the other is more go-with-the-flow. Planning is challenging enough – especially during the back-to-school season – but when co-parents have vastly different planning styles, there are tools and approaches that can help:

Set-up a “Kid” Email Account

Believe it or not, email is a great method for co-parenting communication. A colleague of mine in the co-parenting space, Dr. Tara Egan with Egan Counseling and Consulting, recently recommended this method for clients and I think it’s brilliant. She suggests that each parent will create an email account to use only for communication related to the child/children. When you set up these accounts, lay out some guidelines and expectations for emailing, like having only one topic per email or how to title the subject lines. Tara recommends being pretty specific in the subject line such as “Ella’s YMCA Soccer, Fall 2023” or “Kid’s Dentist Appt 10/23/23 at 4pm” with supplemental information in the body.

Download a Co-parenting App

In today’s tech savvy world, there are plenty of scheduling apps that can sync with calendars on your phones, laptops, and other devices. There are also several apps (OurFamilyWizard, WeParent, Cozi, and FamCal) geared toward co-parents that have been wildly successful for my clients at ROAD to RESOLUTION. Both parents can be responsible for inputting events and plans; however, if one parent is a super planner and handles all registration and coordination, perhaps the other parent can be responsible for inputting the data into the app.

Capitalize on Each Other’s Strengths

When it comes to planning, take advantage of your co-parenting partner’s strengths and let go of their faults. This can be hard, but if you spend time focusing on the other parent’s weaknesses or perceived weaknesses while hoping that they’ll change, it will only frustrate you and make things even harder. Instead, work with the talents within your co-parenting family and not against them. This can include everything from creating schedules and handling sign-ups to volunteering at school and helping with homework. Assigning tasks to each parent is a great way to make sure all parents, even stepparents, are included in your child’s education and activities.

Hire a Co-Parenting Coach or Counselor

If you and your co-parent still find that it’s difficult to communicate respectfully about your children due to an on-going communication issue or each parent’s different communication style is having a negative impact on the child, it may be time to involve a co-parenting expert. As a trained co-parenting coach, I use a child-centered method that prioritizes the wellbeing of your children while helping to implement and maintain a co-parenting communication plan that works.

Note: This feature is intended to be informational only and shall not be construed as legal advice. 


Robin M. Mermans is a collaborative attorney, certified mediator, and co-parenting specialist. She owns ROAD to RESOLUTION, a divorce mediation and collaborative family law firm, in Charlotte. With her unique perspective as an attorney, mother, and stepmother, she is an expert in shared parenting solutions and co-parenting guidance. She is committed to using her personal story and passion to help her clients save time and money, while avoiding unnecessary emotional turmoil during their divorce journey and on their road to resolution.

Wellness Matters Leave a Comment

Previous Post: « Easy Summer Beauty
Next Post: Weekend Wants: Splurge or Steal? »

Reader Interactions

Leave a Reply Cancel reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Primary Sidebar

Instagram icon   Facebook icon   Pinterest icon   LikeToKnow.It icon

Subscribe to Peachy

Sign up for your free subscription to Peachy the Magazine.

Kirsten Dexter Spring 2025 Ad
Capizzi Fall 2024 Ad
Cake For Dinner Summer 2025 Ad
Road to Resolution Ad
Ellen Kelly Homes Summer 2025 ad
Wendy Bilas Ad

Contact Us

Questions? Comments? Interested in partnering with us? We would love to hear from you.

Privacy Policy and Disclaimers

Footer


A special thanks to our fabulous partners:
Kirsten Dexter Fine Jewelry logo     Capizzi MD logo     Road to Resolution logo       Ellen Kelly Helen Adams Realty logo       Cake For Dinner logo     Lisa Cashion SparkWell logo     Wendy Bilas Fine Art logo

© 2025 Peachy the Magazine · Wordpress theme by Design By Bloom